How to network on LinkedIn without being that person

You know the message. You accept a connection request and within a minute there's a pitch in your inbox. Three paragraphs about their services, a calendar link, and a follow-up two days later asking if you saw it.

Nobody wants to be that person, so most senior people swing the other way and don't network on LinkedIn at all. That's a mistake. Done properly, LinkedIn is the best networking tool there has ever been. Here's how to use it without becoming the person everyone mutes.

1. Start with a list, not a message

Write down the 50 to 100 people who would change your next year if they knew you. Investors you'd like to raise from. Buyers at companies you want as clients. Peers you respect. Organisers of events you'd like to speak at. People you'd like to hire.

This list is the whole strategy. Without it, networking turns into connecting with whoever shows up in your feed.

2. Be visible before you're in their inbox

Before you send anything, spend a few weeks being useful in public. Read what the people on your list post and leave comments that add something: a counterpoint, an example from your own work, a question that shows you actually read it. “Great post!” doesn't count.

Done consistently, this changes everything. When your connection request finally arrives, it's from someone they already recognise.

3. Write connection notes like a person

A good connection note is short and specific. It says why you're reaching out and asks for nothing.

Your post on credit underwriting for gig workers was the clearest thing I've read on it. We've been seeing the same pattern from the lender side. Would be good to be connected.

No pitch. No calendar link. No “I'd love to pick your brain”.

4. Let the relationship breathe

After connecting, keep doing what you were doing: commenting, sharing their work when it's genuinely good, replying to their stories. If there's a natural reason to talk, a funding round, a new role, a post where you have something real to add, send a short message. Ask for a conversation only once there's a reason for one.

5. Make the DM easy to say yes to

When you do ask, be specific about why and keep it small. “Would you be open to a 20 minute call next week? I'd like to compare notes on how you're handling enterprise procurement” gets far more yeses than “Let's connect sometime”.

6. Never automate it

Automation tools promise hundreds of connections a week. What they deliver is hundreds of strangers who've seen your name attached to a template. LinkedIn's user agreement doesn't allow most of these tools, and accounts that use them get restricted. Your reputation is worth more than the time saved.

7. Keep score of the right things

Connection counts don't matter. Track how many people on your list now know who you are, how many conversations you've had, and what came out of them. Ten real relationships a quarter is a very good result.

Where content fits in

Networking and content feed each other. Your posts give people a reason to accept your request, and your network gives your posts the right first readers. That's why we run strategic networking and content under one plan for our clients.